Cristina – ‘Disco Clone’ (ZE records, 1978)

Whatever the long-absent Sophie’s Choice, A Fish Called Wanda and, erm… Wild Wild West actor does next, let’s hope he injects the same level of hammy lugubriousness into it that he did in his little-known appearance on the above “mutant disco” oddity. Oh, and fair warning, it features one of the most irritating, ingratiating choruses of ALL TIME.