Saturday night dating show Take Me Out on ITV surely has to be the most empty, pointless husk of television since its obvious precedent, Chris Tarrant’s Man-O-Man (check out that horrible jazzy music, and Requiem For A Dream-esque hen-night from hell atmosphere). Take Me Out is similarly all flash and no-trousers; a headache-inducing cocktail of hair-trigger editing, meaningless soundbites and flagrant stupidity from all involved.
Paddy McGuinness, yesterday
The show is cheifly notable for Paddy McGuinness (above), blasting out a bewildering range of hopeless catchprases in his oft-indecipherable Northern tongue, none of which have a cat in hell’s chance of actually catching. The only one that I could remember after the show was “…and remember, if you no-likey, no-lighty!” – this refers to the key action of the show; the premise of which I simply can’t be bothered to explain. “Nice to see you, to see you … nice!” and “Whatchoo talkin’ ’bout, Willis?” can rest easy in their catchphrase beds at night (after Roy Walker has tucked them in).
Yet, for some mystical reason, I know I will be watching this again. Next week and every week. This makes me hate myself a bit. It makes me feel a bit like going to the nearest cliff and doing this…
Permanent Plastic Helmet 
I read with severed interest your post regarding Take Me Out.
O’Shea is an amiable fellow, who has clearly jumped at the chance to get involved in the key prime-time slot. Within weeks, expect the catch-phrases to be recycled up and down the country, be it schools, offices and A&E’s.
The show features 30 of the Finest Female Specimen (FFS) I have laid my eyes on, and I only hope that the show is not live, for deprieving the clubs of Doncaster/Romford/Sheffield such talent would surely lead to economic disaster in such towns.
If you care to discuss this more, I’ll be propped at the bar with a bottle of Corona in Fernando’s.